Living Clutter Free Forever - decluttering tips,home organizing, minimalist living

Is sentimental clutter holding you back? How to let go without guilt and embrace the freedom of a simplified life #140

Caroline Thor - Professional Organizer - KonMari® Consultant

Is sentimental clutter holding you back?

Do you have boxes of keepsakes you just can't let go of? Ever feel like every item has a memory, and getting rid of it feels impossible?

Here’s the truth: sentimental clutter weighs more than just physical space—it holds emotional weight too. And while those items might spark memories, they can also keep you stuck in the past, stopping you from enjoying a clutter-free, organized home.

But what if I told you that letting go doesn’t mean losing the memory?

In this week's podcast episode, ‘Is Sentimental Clutter Holding You Back? How to Let Go Without Guilt and Embrace the Freedom of a Simplified Life,’ I’ll show you how to handle those sentimental items with compassion and confidence. You’ll learn actionable declutter strategies that work—even when the guilt feels overwhelming.

Imagine this: A home that reflects the present, not the past. A life filled with intentional living, not surrounded by overwhelming clutter.

Why keep what no longer serves you? Why let guilt dictate your home organization?

This episode is packed with small wins to help you take the first step toward a clutter-free home. Whether it's your child’s outgrown toys, a mountain of old cards, or those sentimental “just in case” items, I’ll guide you through practical, confidence-building strategies to finally let go.

🎧 Tune in and discover:

  • How to reframe your relationship with sentimental items.
  • Why memories live in you, not in objects.
  • Simple, effective decluttering techniques inspired by the KonMari Method.

It’s time to embrace the freedom of a tidier home and an unburdened mind. You’ve got this.

Listen now, because the space you’re dreaming of is closer than you think.

I would LOVE to hear from you. Text Message me here.

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Speaker 1:

Hi there, I'm Caroline Thor, professional organiser, konmari consultant, teacher and mum of three. I started off my life as a mum feeling overwhelmed, disorganised and desperately trying to carve out some time for me amongst the nappies, chaos and clutter. One day, one small book called the Life-Changing Magic of Tidying changed everything and I began to learn strategies for making everyday life easier. Today I have the systems in place that means life can throw almost anything at me, and I want to share them with you. If you're an overwhelmed mum struggling to keep it together, then this is the podcast for you. Grab a coffee and settle in for a quick chat with someone who gets your reality. Hello, and thank you for joining me today on the living clutter free forever podcast. I'm caroline and, if you've not listened before, I'm a professional organizer and trained konmari consultant and mom of three kids. There is always a lot going in our house. It's super busy, it's super chaotic sometimes, but thankfully, due to having a decluttered and organized house, my life is so much easier and I want to share my tips and tricks and strategies with you. So I hope you find this episode really useful. It's actually an episode that's come about from a message I got a long time ago now on Instagram from Leanne, and she's written to me and said I would love your perspective as a mom, being that your children are a bit older than mine. Ours are six and 10 years.

Speaker 1:

There is a constant struggle that I spoke with a friend about yesterday which is what to keep. We all have this idea of oh, the kids love this, maybe we should be saving it for our grandchildren someday. Or this was such a quality item I hate to part with it. And then we all end up feeling paralyzed by the stuff and there it sits. I know the Caroline quote keep the best, get rid of the rest, and you're not parting with the memory, just the item. But it's hard sometimes. How did you manage that with your kids' belongings toys, clothing, all of the favorite books, want-nothing, baby blankets, etc. Because as mums, this is something we all deal with and often need the reminders and guidance. I suppose this falls into sentimental items, but maybe it's not really sentimental, but you just really like it. And then you think about some of the treasures from your grandparents in the attic and how fun it was. But at some point it does get ridiculous and too much.

Speaker 1:

So I think it would be great to have a chat that would resonate with your listeners, so I was so happy to receive this. I love it when I get ideas from listeners, either through the podcast or over email or over Instagram. I'm always getting messages on Instagram and, with that in mind, a shout out to Janina. Thank you, janina. I actually got to meet Janina at my workshop on Saturday and she had written to me in the new year and said happy new year. I came across your podcast after searching for the KonMari method. Thanks for everything you share. Well, thanks for showing up for yourself on Saturday, janina. I hope you had fun and I know you're listening to my podcast now when you do your decluttering, so I hope that's going really well for you.

Speaker 1:

Okay, back to Leanne's question. It got me thinking. It's a long time since I did an episode on sentimental items, so I decided to call this episode how to handle sentimental clutter letting go without the guilt because it is something that I know a lot of you struggle with. Now, if you are following the KonMari method, the recommendation is that you do not deal with any sentimental items until you have covered every single other category in your home. So if you really are wanting to declutter and organize and tidy your home, do the whole tidy festival using the KonMari method then the best thing to do is get a large cardboard box or plastic box If you've got one free. Don't go out and buy plastic unless you already have it there. And every time in any category that you're working on that you find a sentimental item, pop it into the box so that they're kept safe and you can deal with them right at the end. So that would be my first piece of advice Do not try and deal with sentimental items as you're sorting out your kids' clothes or you are going through stuff in the living room or you're going through your books, the reason being it gets you stuck because sentimental items are difficult. We're standing there deliberating should I keep it, shouldn't it? Oh, I don't know, and very often we end up keeping it because we don't know. And getting stuck means that you don't make progress on the category as quickly as you could do. So with putting something away in a box for safekeeping until a later date, you're keeping moving and I think that is just amazing that you're not getting stuck and wasting time and also, having gone through all the other categories, you're going to be in such a good place of knowing exactly what sparks joy for you, exactly what serves a purpose for you in your ideal lifestyle, and then, when you get out that probably very large box of sentimental items at the end, it's going to be quicker and easier to go through because you will know by then what you need to keep.

Speaker 1:

There is an emotional weight of letting go of things which is tied to memories, and that is what Leanne was talking about when she said about her kids stuff. There are memories. You've had events and times and special days when kids have been wearing things or playing with certain things, and it's really important that you handle sentimental clutter with compassion and also with confidence. And if you need a bit of help with that, listen back to the previous two episodes because there are lots of things in there that will really help you with this. So the emotional ties we have are nostalgia, as I've just said, or we feel guilt. Someone's given this to us. It's really hard to let go. Perhaps they have since passed and therefore the guilt is even greater for letting go of this thing.

Speaker 1:

Or another reason we very often will hold onto sentimental clutter is purely a fear of forgetting. What if we let go of that item and then we forget that moment or we forget that person? Another reason why sentimental clutter is so challenging is because of cultural or familial expectations about keeping certain things. There may be within your culture or your family that it's not okay to get rid of something that someone has gifted you, or if you were given something for your wedding, that it's bad luck to then get rid of it, things like that. So that might be something that is causing a challenge, things like that so that might be something that is causing a challenge. And another thing that's very challenging is our inner belief that we have developed which isn't true, but we've developed this belief that our memories or relationships are tied to physical objects, and that is something that can really cause problems.

Speaker 1:

And then, relating to Leanne's question kids, toys and clones these are often symbolizing milestones and moments in your child's life and it makes it especially hard to part with them. I know, when my kids were starting to get older and were not necessarily wanting their toys in the room anymore that they'd been playing with in their toddler years. It is really, really hard to donate or move those things on or sell them because your kids have enjoyed playing with them. You've enjoyed sitting on the floor and playing with them. We will cover that in the next little part.

Speaker 1:

So you need to reframe your relationship with sentimental items if you're going to have any chance of letting go of those that don't serve you or bring you joy. It's important to remember that memories live in you, not in the objects. I'll say that again Memories live in you, not in the objects. The object can spark a memory, but you do actually have the memory inside of you. You don't need that object in order to remember, and when you recognize the joy that the item has already brought into your life, it sometimes makes it easier to then let it go. Letting go does not then mean forgetting or dishonoring the person or the memory. We have framed it to be like that, but that isn't actually true. And for kids' items, I think what really helps is to reflect on how your child has grown up and how the memories are always going to be part of your story, even without the physical objects. Even without the physical objects, they just are. And that's the same for all sentimental items. They are part of your story, even if they no longer exist in a physical form in your home.

Speaker 1:

So here's the gold, practical strategies for letting go. First of all, start small. So you've collected together all of your emotional and sentimental belongings and items, and by start small I mean begin with those less emotionally charged items, because this will help build your confidence. So perhaps you see something in the box that now, having gone through all the other categories in your home, you're like why on earth did I think I needed to keep that? And it will be a quick and easy decision. So start small, with the less emotionally charged ones.

Speaker 1:

I always recommend having a keep box or a memory box for each person of the family and save a small and curated selection of truly meaningful items. That means that as you're looking through, it's actually really fun, because you're thinking what would I choose to put in my keep box? And if your keep box or memory box I tend to call it memory box if it's a certain size, then that limits what you can keep. So if you can only fit in what fits in this box, what would you have in there? What would be your most go-to items?

Speaker 1:

Another thing you can do before letting items go is take a photo of them and that digitally preserves the memory without keeping the physical item. I had a client who was really struggling to let go of two pairs of boots because of the memories of the time. She had worn them to amazing events. She just had the most brilliant memories attached to these boots, but she didn't actually fit in them anymore and they did not look good anymore. They were completely worn out, but she'd hung on to them because of this emotional attachment to them, the memories that were attached to them. So she did take a photo of each of the pairs of boots, and then she really held them and gave them a hug and said thank you for carrying me through these amazing times, and she was able to let them go. So taking a photo can sometimes be the thing that will then allow you to let the item go with gratitude. One warning, though, which I am always banging on about, but I'm going to mention it again because I can't say this often enough if you take a photo, create immediately a folder on your phone or on your desktop that says sentimental items photos or emotional items photos, and drop the photo straight in there. Otherwise, all you're doing is creating digital chaos. So that is my top tip for you.

Speaker 1:

Okay, another strategy for letting go is to repurpose or display them so you could turn sentimental items into functional or beautiful keepsakes. I had one client who had a real problem with letting go of any of her children's past clothes and there were a lot of them and so what she did was she sent them all away and had them made up for each child into a quilt. So she turned these sentimental items into something functional and beautiful that the children would be able to keep going forward. So if you can find a way to keep the item but display it or repurpose it in some way, then that is absolutely fine. Repurpose it in some way, then that is absolutely fine.

Speaker 1:

Kids toys and clothes. Okay, here we go back to Leanne's question. Initially, try to involve your children if appropriate, meaning if they are old enough, but really from the age of three, four upwards, they can tell you what they like and what they don't like. Involve them in choosing what to keep or donate. It is always really interesting to me, when I'm working with children and mum is in the room, how the child will say, yes, I'm happy to let that go, I want another child to be able to play with it, and mum will jump in going, really Do. Do you want to get rid of that? But grandma gave it to you. Well, okay, now he's got the emotional attachment to it. Or is putting pressure on the child to keep something that actually they are ready to let go? Children don't worry so much whether grandma gave it to them for christmas three years ago. If they're no longer playing with that particular toy, they can quite rationally see that letting it go to make space for new toys is a really sensible idea. So don't hang on to things just because someone gave it to them or you have memories. If your child is ready to let go, then fine.

Speaker 1:

As I've already said, you create quilts from sentimental clothes and photograph toys and clothes before letting them go. That way you will still have the memory of them. If your child has worn that outfit, you've probably got a photo of them wearing it anyway. So it's not like you're never going to see that particular outfit being worn again. You will in your photographs if your photographs are organized and you can find that particular one when you want it. But that's a whole different episode. So that is how you can perhaps deal with your kids' toys and clothes.

Speaker 1:

What I actually did was I got a very sturdy box two sturdy boxes actually. Into one of them I put books that I had read to my children when they were little, that they had really enjoyed listening to. These were the books that they'd asked over and over again. You know the ones. Every night they want the same book read to them. I put those books into a box and I have kept them, but I could only put in the box what fitted in the box, so I had to be really picky about what I kept, and maybe one day my kids, friends or my kids will have kids and they'll come round and I can sit and read to them. For me there is also the added pull, if you like, that I live in Germany, and so I had sourced a lot of children's books in English because I wanted to be able to read to my children in English, and as we were decluttering as they got older, there was part of me thinking how easy is it going to be to get hold of this book again Now, it probably would have been, but having gone to all the trouble to get them in the first place, I decided to hold on to books more than I did toys, so I do have a box of books up in the attic in case one day I might want to read them again, and then in my other books I have a very small selection of children's toys from different ages, so a couple of baby toys, a couple of toddler toys, a couple of slightly older kids toys, and one thing we did keep was a relatively large, actually, box of duplo bricks, so the big lego bricks because my kids loved playing with those like really loved and we have recently had a little boy coming around to play at ours and it's just great to be able to get the box of duplo out and he's super happy building and I have the feeling that over the years these are definitely going to get played with and used again when we have visitors with small children, and I love the fact that I've got something that I can pull out and I know they're going to love playing with it.

Speaker 1:

So that perhaps is something to take into consideration if you're not sure what toys to keep, so keep a small selection and ones that you know kids are going to enjoy playing with. Okay, how do we deal with the guilt of letting things go that are sentimental? I really think you need to acknowledge and sit with the guilt. It's natural to feel guilty letting go of some things, but it's not a reason to hold on to it and you can reframe your guilt as a sign of care or connection or love for that moment in your life or that person in your, and you can really be clear that by letting go you can actually honor a memory. By making space for the present past, you're almost not allowing yourself to be completely present in your life now or thinking forward to the future.

Speaker 1:

So how about making space for the present by letting go of some sentimental items that you know really are not serving you, for kids items? Please reassure yourself that your child won't miss items that they've outgrown and that donating them can bring huge joy to another family. And I really think you need to embrace that, because I have held on to things when my kids were little, like birthday cards that they had received or things that they'd been given at certain events, and when I've shown them now they're a bit older, they've been like why did you hang on to that? I don't need that. I don't want that. So we can't assume for our kids what it is that they are going to want to hold on to, and they won't miss items they've outgrown. When it comes to clothes or toys, they just won't. Maybe something special like a picture they've been given by grandma or a card that was written with a really beautiful message in for them Something like that is worth perhaps keeping, but not just toys and clothes Really not. They will not miss them. The one thing I did keep, just because I thought it would be fun for my kids to see when they're older, is I kept their first ever pair of shoes in their memory box and I also kept the outfit that I brought them home from the hospital in. And then that's their decision later. It's not my decision. They can look at that memory box when they're old enough. I've decided I'm going to give it to them on their 21st birthday, and if they look at me and go, mom, why, why am I choosing here? Then fine. That's then their choice to decide to let go of it, but it's not mine, okay. Finally, I would say to you it's important to find the joy in letting go.

Speaker 1:

There are so many times that I can think of when releasing sentimental items can actually be really freeing. I'll give you an example. I had been holding on to jewelry that my grandmother had bought me over the years, because my grandmother had given it to me and it had been sitting in a drawer in my bedroom for years and I never put it on because she'd bought me lots of jewelry that was gold and I like wearing silver. That's just. As I grew up, I realized that I preferred the look of silver to gold. So I started when I was on my KonMari journey to think well, it's a bit ridiculous having this whole drawer taken up with jewelry that I never, ever wear. I mean, it's basically like a small storage facility that I'm paying rent on. So I took the items and I had them valued and I ended up selling them because there was no point in keeping something I was never going to be wearing, and actually letting those items go on that day was really freeing. I chose to keep one gold bracelet that she'd given me that I knew was particularly special to her. She had worn it and she'd passed it on to me. I kept that one, but the others that she'd gone to the jewellers and bought for me for birthdays, those I let go, and it was such a relief because I felt guilty that I wasn't wearing them, like she'd gone to the effort of buying these for me and I'd never once taken them out of the boxes and worn them and I felt really guilty for that. So actually letting them go and using the money to buy something that I really needed at the time was so freeing. So I highly recommend looking at each item and thinking, okay, if I let this go, is it actually going to make me feel better? Because it quite possibly could do. When you can find the joy in letting go, it creates space and peace for new experiences and memories, and that is truly a wonderful thing.

Speaker 1:

And when we go back to Leanne's question with kids items, freeing up space allows your children to focus on items that suit their current stage of life. Think about that. If their bedroom is only full of age-appropriate things, imagine how much more that space is supporting them than if they have got bins in there full of baby toys, because nobody can actually face letting them go. And if you move the stuff out of your children's bedroom, great, but where is it now? Is it blocking up your cellar room? Is it blocking up your attic? Is it blocking up your garage? Is it standing at the end of your bed, in your bedroom. Think about this. It's taking up space in your life that could be freed up.

Speaker 1:

So I would encourage you to tackle one small sentimental category this week, whether it's cards. Maybe you've got a whole box full of cards that have been written to you, or inherited items, whatever it happens to be, or your kids' toys or your kids' clothes, and I would like you to take this mantra or affirmation whatever you like to call it for the process I'm offering this to you. Say to yourself I am keeping the memory, not the item. I am keeping the memory, not the item, and if you keep saying that to yourself, it's going to really help you in the process of letting things go. So, just to recap, sentimental clutter does not define your memories or relationships, and remember that letting go is a personal journey. There's no sort of timeline by which everyone should be able to let go of sentimental items. Go at your pace. If you're going through the sentimental box and you can easily make decisions about other things, but other things you're really stuck on and you're really unsure. Maybe you're not ready to deal with those things yet. Maybe you need to put the lid back on the box or close it up and put a note in your calendar for three months, six months time, that you're going to look at sentimental again.

Speaker 1:

I would love to hear how you're getting on. I would love to invite you to share your sentimental decluttering progress or your insights with me. Either you can message me directly from the show notes in this episode where it says I'd love to hear from you, but please, please, add your name to the message because I don't see who sent it. It's completely anonymous. So please just put your first name so I know who's messaged me. And if you want to put your email in there, then do and I will email you back. Or hop over to Instagram at carothor and send me a message there. So thank you again to Leanne for inspiring this episode.

Speaker 1:

It's turned into a bit of a long one. I probably could do episode after episode after episode on sentimental items, but I hope that's given you a bit of a starting point. Mental items but I hope that's given you a bit of a starting point. And one thing I wanted to share was that on Saturday I had the Declutter your Mindset workshop. It was brilliant. Thank you to all the people that came. If you're listening, you were amazing. The chat was on fire like really, really great participation. So, thank you, thank you you.

Speaker 1:

Someone at the end asked me how they could find out more about my online membership, clutter free collective, and I hadn't brought any links to the workshop because I wasn't selling anything. I just wanted to give everyone a chance to find a way to improve their mindset. So if you are interested in finding out more about Clutterbury Collective and you were there and you didn't receive my email this week then if you go to the link in the show notes for Clutterbury Collective, you can find out more then. Okay, I'm excited to see how you get on with your sentimental items. Until next time, if you've enjoyed this episode, please send the link to a friend you know would appreciate it, subscribe and leave a review. I look forward to bringing you more organising tips next time, but if you can't wait until then, you can go to my website or find me on Instagram, at carothor, or on Facebook at Caroline Organiser. Thanks for listening and I look forward to guiding you on your journey to find your clutter-free ever after.