Intentional Living for a Slow Holiday Season. How to Have a Stress-Free Celebration with Annemarie Stolting #080

As we head into the hustle and bustle of the holiday season, we're inviting you to hit pause, take a deep breath, and join us for a candid conversation with Annemarie Stolting, the voice behind the popular podcast, Let's Slow Down. Together, we're daring to challenge the norm, embracing the notion that less can indeed be more, and sharing valuable insights on how to navigate the holidays with intentionality, authenticity, and a sense of calm. Annemarie, a busy mom of three, shares her transformative journey towards a decluttered, more intentional way of living that's sure to inspire you to reevaluate your own approach to life, especially during this busy season.

Surviving the holidays stress-free may sound like an impossible task, but we're here to change that narrative. We're sharing our tried and tested strategies to help you stay balanced and healthy amidst the holiday chaos. From practical tips on how to manage your schedule and maintain a serene environment to the crucial aspects of rest, hydration, and balanced meals, we've got you covered. And remember, it's okay to resist the urge to create a picture-perfect holiday setting as portrayed on social media. Your well-being is what truly matters!

Of course, we understand the holidays aren't just about surviving, but enjoying and making memories. That's why we're also navigating the tricky world of holiday traditions and the stress they sometimes bring. We're going to walk you through setting boundaries, making choices that resonate with you and your family, and ditching the societal and familial pressures that often rob us of the joy of the season. But don't worry, we're not all work and no play. We're also sharing how you can make the holiday season enjoyable with fun! Trust us, you won't want to miss it. So grab a cup of hot cocoa, settle in, and let's take this holiday season slow and steady, together.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:27

Hi there, I'm Caroline Thor, professional organizer, konmari consultant, teacher and mum of three. I started off my life as a mum feeling overwhelmed, disorganized and desperately trying to carve out some time for me amongst the nappies, chaos and clutter. One day, one small book called the Life Changing Magic of Tidying changed everything and I began to learn strategies for making everyday life easier. Today, I have the systems in place that means life can throw almost anything at me, and I want to share them with you. If you're an overwhelmed mum struggling to keep it together, then this is the podcast for you. Grab a coffee and settle in for a quick chat with someone who gets your reality.

Speaker 1: 1:22

Hello and welcome to this very special episode of Living Clutter Free Forever. Today there's going to be somewhat of a departure in that we're not specifically talking about decluttering and organizing, but I thought it was a topic that would be really useful to you just before the holiday season. I have got a special guest, amarie Stolting, from the podcast let's Slow Down, and we're going to be talking about how to slow down and intentionally do less in the holiday season. I hope you enjoy our conversation. Hello, amarie, welcome. Thank you for joining me today.

Speaker 2: 1:59

Thank you for inviting me here.

Speaker 1: 2:01

You are very welcome. Now I just think I ought to explain to everyone listening. I was on your podcast. Let's Slow Down. Not so long ago we had connected online when both of us were looking for guests for our podcasts and it was just the most amazing chat I had with you. It was so much fun. There were so many spooky coincidences between our lives. It was totally crazy and the connection was really great. As soon as we finished recording for your podcast, I was like she has to come on my podcast. That's why you're here today.

Speaker 2: 2:42

I'm so excited to talk to you again. We had so much fun last time. This is going to be great.

Speaker 1: 2:47

Absolutely. Tell everyone a little bit about yourself.

Speaker 2: 2:51

I live in New Jersey. I am a working mom of three children similar to you, similar ages. My daughter is 15. My son is 12. My youngest daughter is nine. They're in three different schools. We've got a lot going on with them. My husband and I try to juggle all of the schedules and the activities and just all of our personal work commitments and everything. We have a lot of living going on. I should add, we also have two large rescue dogs. We throw them into the mix. Life's a lot of fun, but life's busy. Life is chaotic.

Speaker 2: 3:31

About a year ago, I decided to start my podcast called let's Slow Down because I was feeling like everything was just moving too fast. My daughter had started high school. We're looking at just a few more years before she's off to college. I don't know how we got here. I feel like we blinked and they're just getting old so quickly. We're getting old so quickly.

Speaker 2: 3:59

I just really felt like I wanted to pump the brakes a bit and reexamine things. I've been reading a lot about this topic for a long time, but I just felt the need to highlight it and start talking about it more because I was thinking if I'm feeling this way, I do feel kind of isolated and alone sometimes with how I'm feeling, that things are so overwhelming and busy. I thought there's got to be other people out there that are feeling the same way and maybe we can have a conversation about it and maybe this will resonate with someone and make them feel less alone and validate how they're feeling and help them. I've been having a lot of fun talking about living more simply, more intentionally, and obviously decluttering and having less stuff goes hand in hand with all of this. I should mention that my former job was a music teacher. Just like you, caroline, we really do. We do have so many common threads throughout our life, which is so interesting.

Speaker 2: 5:06

Looking back to my years as a music teacher, which I really enjoyed a lot, I love kids and music was always my passion. I'm a clarinetist, but it was obviously noisy, very noisy. I would have sometimes 150 kids in my beginner band. Just think about the noise in that room and the chaos. Every rowdy little boy wants to be a drummer. We always would have 25 drummers in there, drum sticks getting thrown across the room. It was organized, chaos on a good day, but I did enjoy it. It did burn me out after a while, but I had a lot of fun while I was doing that.

Speaker 2: 5:48

Just looking back, there was just always in my adult life there was just always a lot going on, a lot. It was big, a lot of people, a lot of noise, a lot of commitments. I don't know. I guess hitting my 40s, I finally was like I don't want to have a lot going on anymore, I want to have less. Here I am trying to figure out how to do that, because it is a work in progress. For sure, it's a worthwhile journey, but it is something that is constantly something that I don't want to say struggling with, because I think I've gotten over that hump, but I struggled with it for a long time how to really incorporate less and live more in the present so that I'm less distracted by all of these outside things.

Speaker 1: 6:35

I love what you said before about. I mean, you listed a few things. One of them was to live more simply and one of them was to live more intentionally. I think when you go about it in an intentional way, this is the decision I've made, this is how I want to live. I don't want to be running around like a blue-ass fly the whole time chasing my tail, which isn't easy when you have three kids and two dogs and everything that comes with that. I think the intentionality is really, really important, whereas a lot of people actually, when COVID hit and we were all in lockdown as we were all over the world and lots of people were finding it really hard, I enjoyed it. I really loved not having to be at appointments every day, not having to leave the house at a certain time. There was just suddenly nothing apart from online school.

Speaker 2: 7:33

I enjoyed it too.

Speaker 1: 7:36

And I just loved it and I said to my husband up because up until that point we were the sort of people that every weekend we would have people over or we'd be going somewhere or we'd have people coming to stay. There was every weekend. There was something. And I remember a point during COVID when I said to my husband I am not going back to that, it was too much. I have realized that I functioned better when there is more space in our lives and we have been more intentional about that. So I think that was really cool what you said.

Speaker 2: 8:09

I felt the same way during COVID. I really did. I mean, obviously it was a huge adjustment and stressful for other reasons, just with everything going on in the world, but that that break and having that peace and just having that, it was like a gift in some ways to have this time just with your family and your own little bubble, to just reconnect and spend time together and not be at the mercy of these crazy schedules and routines all the time. I thought it was wonderful and I said the same thing to my husband, like I don't want to go back to that. And you do, you know, sure enough.

Speaker 2: 8:45

As soon as things started to kind of go back to quote, unquote, normal everything, I was like there's no way people are going to start with these schedules again and and having as many practices with the sports and the clubs and everything, and they did. It's like it's like a switch flipped and everything just went back to being crazy again. And I was really caught off guard by that because I really thought more people again maybe, you know, I guess for the minority I really thought more people would have used that as a lesson and as and embrace that you know moving forward. But boy, did it go back to the way that it was? So it is all the more reason that we have to be intentional. And it wasn't that long ago, just a couple of years ago.

Speaker 2: 9:28

I don't know what happened to me, but I realized it wasn't one particular thing that happened, but I realized that it's a choice. We have a choice. You know, nobody's forcing us to sign up for all these things or to fill our calendars to the brim or overflow our calendars, like no one's forcing us to do these things. Yeah, it seems to be the norm with our society and our culture, but nobody's forcing you to do it. And you can say no to things, you can back out of things, you can have less, you can say no to the stuff in the store, and we have choices and it's it. Finally was a wake up call for me, like, ok, start making the choices that align more with how you want to live, and it's made a really great difference.

Speaker 1: 10:14

It does. It's like a jigsaw puzzle. When you get all the pieces in the right place so less stuff in your home, understanding it's OK to say no to things working out what for you is a priority or what for your family is a priority when you get all those pieces right and they slot together, it's like some sort of magic happens. It's quite incredible and I actually had a message today on my phone from someone saying oh, come on, let's, let's meet up one evening before Christmas. It'd be great to go out for a drink, let's do that.

Speaker 1: 10:54

And I messaged her back and said I'm not prepared to commit to that at the moment. I've got a lot going on. I don't want to overload my calendar. I'm just going to hold back on that for now and I'll get back in touch when it feels like the right time. You know, don't take it personally. I would love to see you, but I'm just not going to overload my calendar at the moment. And she messaged back and said fine, totally understand. And I think we're worried very often that people are not going to understand, that they're going to think we're strange or take it personally, that we don't want to see them, rather than it being taken in the way in which it's intended.

Speaker 2: 11:29

Yes, yes, and you know, oftentimes when you say it like you did, you were really kind and you just spelled it out, you were just really honest. They're like, yeah, you know, I got a lot going on too, probably better to hold off. It's like we have these good intentions, we want to do all these things, we want to see these friends and you know, attend all these different events and things, but it just, I think we all have to really learn what is the right amount for us Personally. It's going to be different for every individual, but and it's often, you know, it's different. Taking it out a step further, it's different.

Speaker 2: 12:07

A lot of times with spouses and with families, like I have learned over these last few years that I am more introverted, and that surprised me because, as I said, I've always been. I've been a social person. I have directed bands of 150 kids and stood in front of crowds of 600 people, you know, as the conductor, and I've done these things and enjoyed them. But boy, did they take a lot out of me and I realized that later. Okay, because it was a lot of people, it was. That was a lot of energy for me and I always thought being introverted meant you were very shy and didn't like to do anything social, but I've I've since, you know, learned a new definition for it, and it's really all about how you replenish yourself, how you restore your energy, how you rest. What fills your cup. And for me, alone, time and peace and quiet fill my cup.

Speaker 2: 13:02

Now for my husband and also for my best friend, two people that I spend a lot of time with. They are very extroverted. They want to fit in more social things. That, to them, rejuvenates them, whereas for me, I get wiped out from that if there's too many in a row. And interestingly, out of my three kids I have two extroverts and one introvert.

Speaker 2: 13:25

So you know it's, it's knowing that about yourself. I think just having that knowledge about how you function best and honoring it is is so valuable so that I mean again took me decades and I know it can probably change. Maybe when I was in my twenties I wasn't so introverted, but but that's where I am today. So just knowing that about yourself and honoring it and then using that as a guide for how you make your decisions, moving forward, and then also really working together and being transparent, like you were with your friend this morning texting. You know being transparent with your family about what you need and how you operate, so like no, it's not that I don't want to go to that party, it's just that I don't think I have it in me. There's too many other things going on. So I think when you explain it that way, it's received differently on the other end.

Speaker 1: 14:20

Yeah, I think you're completely right. Now we're recording this in November, but it's going to be coming out in middle of December, when, of course, it's that time of year when especially women are feeling the full force of organisational hell trying to, oh yeah, fill all the things Definitely. So what we had said we would talk about today is how we can slow down in the buildup to Christmas, which sounds totally impossible and totally counterintuitive, but it is possible and I did it last year and it was one of the nicest Christmases I've ever had. So let's talk a bit. What would you say are things that we can do to simplify and slow down in the buildup to Christmas or the holidays?

Speaker 2: 15:18

Well, I guess along the lines of what we were just talking about with, like how much you can handle in your schedule. I think that's a good place to start and we still have a couple weeks till Christmas. So just really looking at your calendar, like right now, when this episode finishes, go look at your calendar and just, you probably have some holiday plans already mapped out, probably have a lot. Is there anything that you might need to politely decline or take out of your calendar? If you have a few days that are open still, maybe you want to block those off. I am a big fan and I don't do it enough, but when I do it I love it. I literally I still have a Google calendar but I have a paper calendar too. I like pen and paper and I write do nothing, do nothing, like if you have a Saturday afternoon that is still not accounted for, maybe you want to write do nothing there so that you have a little space to breathe, to catch up with whatever it is that you haven't gotten to do because you've been busy doing other things to prepare whatever it might be. So I would encourage you definitely to take a look at that calendar and the schedule and just have the conversations with family if you need to. I know, if I'm not careful, my extended family will have something scheduled, and this has happened before. Literally every single day of the whole holiday, like between Christmas and New Year's, there'll be something with almost the same people but in a little different atmosphere. Every single day and I'm like, look, I love you guys, but I can't do this. Like this is not working for me and you know what. You're not going to make everybody happy, but be nice about it and that's it. That's all you can do. So don't worry too much about pleasing everyone because, guys, you'll never please everyone. You're only going to really exhaust yourself and probably ends up kind of resentful towards some of these people. If you try to just please everybody, it's not selfish to put yourself first, or at least keep yourself in the top three, maybe, and just think about yourself and honor your needs personally, because you'll show up better, you'll show up more authentically than when you do go to those family gatherings. You are excited to be there, you are happy to talk to people and friendly and you are your best self. If you are running yourself ragged by the time and this has happened to me. You know, I hear later oh, she was kind of, she was tired. Yeah, no kidding, I was tired because this was too much. So look at your schedule. I think that that's huge.

Speaker 2: 17:57

I also think that it's really important to get enough rest, get enough sleep. During the holidays, we are often out at more functions out later at night. Figure out a way to still keep some kind of sleeping schedule in there, and if you're going to bed later, then hey, maybe adjust your morning routine or whatever it is that you do. You know, whatever time your alarm goes off, get a little bit more sleep, because that's important and it just keeps you healthier. Obviously, it makes you feel better, but there's also a lot of germs and everything going around this time of year, so it'll keep you healthier.

Speaker 2: 18:30

And, along the same lines of good health, try to incorporate lots of water and healthy, nutritious foods when you can. So, yeah, you're probably eating out. There's a lot more, you know work, parties and just there's a lot more gatherings, and part of that I think part of the allura of it all is all the yummy foods and treats that we get to eat and drink this time of year. So fine, you know, indulge. But hey, maybe on the days when you are home, or the two meals a day that you're eating at home like if you're having breakfast and lunch at home and then you know you're going out to dinner try to make those a little bit healthier. Just try to be mindful and eat well.

Speaker 2: 19:09

A good friend of mine who's a health coach always uses the phrase crowd out on your plate. So crowd out like the quote unquote bad stuff, right, the treats or the extra rich stuff. Crowd them out with fruits and veggies. So you're still letting yourself have everything. But just make some healthy choices, fit some healthy foods in there too. You'll feel so much better. So those are a few things and I and you know saying them. It's like they're all good things to keep in mind and you're not going to be perfect about it. So I think that's one of us are. But I think just bringing them to the forefront and and talking about them will maybe you know when you're going to that party tomorrow. Maybe you'll think OK, you know what, lunch I'm going to have salad and I'm going to drink a big glass of water so that I can go and have my wine tonight and indulge However else I'm going to. So I think those things are just important, like just general ways to stay healthy and feel good at this busy time of year.

Speaker 1: 20:05

And they're also when you've made the decision to do those things, which were great tips. Thank you for those. You're therefore being much more intentional about those things, so you're actually giving some thought to how do I want to live at this time, what works for me, what can I do to make life easier for me or to make me feel better, such as getting enough sleep or eating healthily. So all those sort of things are really important. I think one thing that I'm acutely aware of at this time of year is the pressure that a lot of people feel under to make their homes look amazing, for there to be the biggest spread on the table that they make out to everyone. They've gone all out. They've, you know, nearly killed themselves trying to do it, probably, and I think a lot of us are under pressure from what we see on social media, forgetting that what we see in the video or the photo is set up and what's out around the outside is probably looks just like your house and my house.

Speaker 1: 21:15

Last Christmas, there was a brilliant video where this woman had panned down this beautifully set Christmas dining table. It looked incredible. It was like something out of a film. So she panned down the table and then when she got to the end, she sort of moved slightly to the side and panned to where we hadn't seen before and there were like plastic bags stacked up and cardboard boxes and chaos and she's like this is the reality. I was like thank you, because I think we just drive ourselves crazy trying to achieve what is actually unobtainable or unmaintainable. If that's even a word, it's not maintainable. Unmaintainable when did that come from? Not maintainable?

Speaker 1: 22:08

And I mean I grew up in a home where there was a great emphasis placed on desserts.

Speaker 1: 22:15

I mean my mother and my grandmother would go all out making desserts for birthdays and Christmas and they would spend hours making these desserts which, once you've served everyone on the table, the whole thing's gone and it's eaten in less than five minutes. And I used to just remember thinking, my goodness, and I used to do that when I first had kids I would go all out making desserts and stuff and then suddenly I had this light bulb moment of why that actually is not fun for me, spending all those hours creating something that has gone in a couple of seconds. Yes, I've done something lovely for everybody, but it wasn't worth all those hours spent in the kitchen. It didn't bring me that much joy to watch them all eat it. So last year when I had my husband's family all come over for Christmas, I just bought desserts and like ready-made stuff and put a bit of Holly on top of an end of story and I didn't have all these hours in the kitchen and I enjoyed it so much more. It was amazing.

Speaker 2: 23:20

Yep, yep, I'm the same way. I grew up in a similar house where my mother liked to bake. I mean, every kind of Christmas cookie known to man my mother makes at Christmas and she'll spend weeks and she really loves being in the kitchen. I mean, she seems stressed about it to me, but she says she loves doing it. And that's just not me.

Speaker 2: 23:44

I don't need to and, honestly, too many choices personally, for me is overwhelming. I'd rather have take your top couple, the top favorites that you love, make those or buy them, like you said. Or, better yet, if you're having a lot of people over, hey, assign a few people to dessert, because everyone's always typically most gracious guests say hey, what can I bring? Dessert is a great thing to have people help with. Yes, and we always eat so many appetizers and like dinner and everything that people don't have a ton of room left for dessert anyway. So just don't go crazy.

Speaker 2: 24:23

I think simplifying everything when you're hosting is important so that you can enjoy the gathering. Otherwise you're just working the entire time and especially at Christmas. You don't wanna do that. You wanna be able to enjoy what it's all about, which is spending time with your family and your friends and just getting to relax a little bit. I always laugh, like all those Christmas songs, the silent nights and all is calm and I'm like what is that? What world can I have that? So, trying to embrace a little bit more of that and keeping things simpler what can you make ahead of time? You don't have to make a million things. You don't have to go crazy. Everyone at the heart of it, everyone is there to spend time together. You're gonna have a nice meal. We're all very lucky. We can do that. We can provide that. It doesn't need to be a five-star restaurant with 8,000 choices. They can go out to eat for that another day.

Speaker 1: 25:26

Exactly. I would have one child who is a little bit special when it comes to food and I never thought I would be putting French fries on the Christmas table. But they don't eat anything really that we would eat for a Christmas lunch. And I suddenly thought one year this is really unfair. We're all getting to eat things we like on Christmas day. Why should they miss out? Like they're sitting there looking at all this food, thinking, well, I don't like any of this. So I did sausage and fries and ever since then that's been on the table as well on Christmas day and then everyone's got something they like to eat and I think that's really, really important. It's so funny.

Speaker 1: 26:05

You mentioned Christmas biscuits, christmas cookies. There's a tradition in Germany where tiny little biscuits I mean they really are very small, not cookie size, like not even a quarter of a size of a cookie and they're called pleatian and they're only made in the buildup to Christmas. There must be hundreds of different types of these little pleatian you can make, and my mother-in-law makes so many of them. She spends weeks baking and has tins full of these things and I knew that when she came to visit for Christmas she would bring a very large tin full of a massive selection. So last year I didn't bother making any Because I thought there's no point. She's gonna bring a huge box. We don't need that many little biscuits. And it was the best move I made, because sure enough, she turned up with this enormous tin of pleatian, and hers is so much better than mine anyway. So let her have the joy of gifting that, and I had the joy of not having had to make them.

Speaker 2: 27:10

I mean, that's a win-win, everybody's happy, right. I'm sure she was so honored and proud to contribute that and, like you said, it's a family tradition. Hers are amazing. Let her have that.

Speaker 1: 27:22

Yeah, there are so many other things you can simplify as well. So I think Germany is quite special in that a lot of things are handmade. Traditionally, people make their own wreaths. They actually bind them themselves to go on the door or for their advent candles. So when I first moved to Germany one of the first things my mother-in-law showed me how to do was how to bind a wreath with all the green and fix it all together and how to put the candles in and decorate it and everything and it. I mean she does it quite fast because she's been practicing for a lot of years.

Speaker 1: 27:59

And I have tried over the years to do it because there is something quite therapeutic if you have the time to do it. And then the last few years life's got a lot busier with work and I haven't had the capacity. And last year I went out and I bought from our local florist the most beautiful advent wreath with the candles already in it and it looked so much nicer than anything I could have made. It cost a small fortune but I got to enjoy it for four weeks and the whole family did, and then we still had it there at Christmas and it looked beautiful and that was another amazing thing that I did, and I will be doing that again this year, because they make them much better than I can, and then I get to enjoy it.

Speaker 2: 28:45

I love that, I love that and that's a gift for you. That's a gift for you at the holidays and, like you said, everyone's enjoying it. I think we have to just again. It's like going back to knowing yourself and know what are the things you like doing and stop comparing yourself to anybody, including our mothers, because we are different. Like I am so different from my mom. But then when you're raised that way, you're like oh, am I supposed to be doing all this baking right now? Am I supposed to be doing this and this? No, you're a different person. So, hey, you're going to be better at some things, they're going to be better at some things. Just embrace what you can do and what you enjoy doing. And then you know, buy or reach out to the people who are better at doing the things that stress you out, and there you go.

Speaker 2: 29:36

We all bring something different to the table, and that's beautiful and that's part of a family gathering. I've always grown up where we all bring stuff. We have a huge family, so everybody's always bringing things. Everyone is so happy to do it. So just take them up on it and just be a little bit organized. Like, think about if you're hosting, okay, well, what do we need that day? So that you can, when people say, hey, what do you need, what can I bring? You can assign them appropriately. And it's helpful. You know, if you do it last minute or you don't think about it enough, then you're going to have way too much dessert and maybe not enough food. So, just taking a few minutes to think it through ahead of time and you know, just write out a general menu and what you need for that event and then lean on everybody, and everybody's happy to do it.

Speaker 1: 30:24

I agree with everything you said, apart from one thing there you can never have too much dessert, and Marie. Yeah, I guess people want to be like on board with you with the rest of it, but just.

Speaker 2: 30:36

I was a terrible party. She only had dessert that would be my favorite ever.

Speaker 1: 30:44

Give me a Christmas lunch with only dessert, and I'd be a happy girl. I definitely would. This is one thing that I don't like to say.

Speaker 1: 30:51

I have regrets because I think everything that we have done in our past, it has been a teachable experience. We've learned something from it, so I don't regret it. But the one thing I really wish is that I had worked out A long, long time ago that I do not have to do all this stuff if I don't want to. That this expectation from society or family members that these things are done is entirely up to you whether you choose to do them or not, and you can't worry what everyone else is going to think as long as you're OK and your close family are OK. That's the important thing, and I really wish I had realized that a long, long time ago, because it really is only in the last few years that I have, I wouldn't say, put started to put my foot down, but I've started to prioritize what is important for me and my family over everybody else in a nice way. I'm not being unkind to other people about it, but it's meant that the last few years have been a lot easier on me definitely.

Speaker 2: 32:00

I've done the same thing and you know what it's, that setting boundaries piece, and that's hard to do, it's hard to set them, it's hard to honor them and people around you, especially if you haven't set a lot of boundaries in the past. There's can be pushback because you know a lot of people are just, oh well, they'll just keep going, they'll just keep doing it or they'll what do you mean? You're not coming. You always come and that's OK, it's all OK. Again, like you were just saying, just be nice about it. But you know standard ground and if it's, if it's what you need this year, hey, every year is different, like next year, you might have more time, energy, whatever. You might be able to go back to doing the thing. It's not forever. I think we get in our heads that, oh, if I don't do it this year, then you know I have to keep up with it all. No, so you drop it this year and if it fits into your life better, you do it again next year if you want to. So, embracing that season.

Speaker 2: 33:05

Obviously this is the holiday season, but also the season that you're in in life. You know what age are your kids? Do you have kids? Hey, when I was like 20 and, you know, didn't have children or anybody else worrying about me, I could do all the things and I wouldn't be tired because I could sleep in and I could, you know, rest as much as I want. I had so much downtime. But I'm not in that season currently. If your kids are really little and it's going to be a nightmare If you don't honor their naps or their like bedtime, then honor it, and you know what People are going to make their little comments oh why are you leaving so early? Don't worry about it. They forget what it's like to have a toddler or a screaming baby.

Speaker 2: 33:41

Because I did that once my son needed to go to bed for a short period of time, like six months or maybe longer. His bedtime was 630. And like that's like we didn't even eat dinner yet. I took him. My husband was working and he was my youngest. I had my older daughter, so I was at a Christmas dinner with my two kids and you know I was having fun.

Speaker 2: 34:05

Did I want to leave at 630 or 6 o'clock? No, of course not. But I knew, I knew I was like with a ticking time bomb, like when he hit that point he was going to lose it, but he had been being really good and it was lots of distractions and I was having fun and I just stayed. I stayed longer and I will never forget that car ride home. I don't even know how I drove, because he screamed at the top of his lungs all the way home. It was awful and I was kicking myself the whole time Like I knew better. Why didn't I just do it? And so we just have to know those things about our current situation and just honor them and know that they're not forever. He stays awake past 6.30. Now, guys, we're all good.

Speaker 1: 34:49

That's cool. Now I'm really excited for everyone listening, because I know you have something that is going to really help them through this build up to the holiday season. Would you like to tell everyone what you have on offer for them?

Speaker 2: 35:05

I would love to Thank you. I will give the link to Caroline for the show notes. I have a little campaign going on right now called 12 Days of Holiday Ease.

Speaker 1: 35:18

Oh, that sounds good.

Speaker 2: 35:20

Especially after this conversation we're having like all right, how can we have more ease? It's just really simple, doable little inspirational tips each day. If you sign up, you'll get 12 days of it. I'm really trying to embrace that. You know, all is calm, all is bright this holiday season and little things that you can do, little gifts. You can give yourself a little bit more self-care, like get outside in nature, just setting your priorities, just little reminders each day. If you sign up now, actually it's perfect because it'll take you right into Christmas. So I will give you the link and I encourage you all to sign up for 12 Days of Holiday Ease. I hope that it brings some peace to this time of year for all of you.

Speaker 1: 36:08

That's wonderful. That is such a great gift. Thank you, amarie. I will make sure that link goes into the show notes, and I think it's time for us to perhaps go and have some slow time. I'm going to probably go and make myself a cup of tea now and put my feet up for a few minutes before I get started on the next thing. I've got a very exciting afternoon. I'm going to a Pokemon shop Brilliant, I can't. That's my mom ever. She can't wait, can you tell?

Speaker 2: 36:37

I just can't wait, oh yeah, I can hear it in your voice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I promise my, I'm really thrilled.

Speaker 1: 36:44

I've promised him I will drive him to a Pokemon shop this afternoon. So that's my exciting afternoon, but I'm going to go and sit down and have a cup of tea first. It has been an absolute joy talking to you. Thank you so much. I'm going to have to get you back on at some point because I think let's slow down the name of your podcast and I really must encourage everyone to go and listen. It's absolutely wonderful and Amarie's voice is just calming. When you listen to it, you feel like you've slowed down anyway, so that's really good. So thank you for taking the time to come and talk to me today.

Speaker 2: 37:18

Oh, it was my pleasure. I'd love to do it again, and there's just so much more I think that we could talk about on this topic, and I hope that some of these messages resonated with our listeners today, and I wish everybody a really happy, peaceful holiday season.

Speaker 1: 37:34

Thank you. Thank you, amarie. Oh, my goodness, wasn't that just amazing? It really made me think about how I need to be, or continue to be, intentional about slowing down, not taking on too much, saying yes to the things that I want to do and not feeling like I need to please everyone every step of the way.

Speaker 1: 37:57

In the holiday season. I would love for you to go and grab Amarie's 12 Days of Holiday Ease. I will put the link in the show notes and also there will be information there about how you can get in touch with Amarie. And I would also like to remind you that this week is the last week for grabbing your free month in my new membership, clutter Free Collective. It's going to be the founding members' launch, and I would love to have you join us for the rest of December. Let's see if we can help you get your home holiday ready without any of the stress that usually goes with it. I would love to meet you there. The link for that is also in the show notes, but be careful, because if you don't grab that soon, you're going to be missing out on that until the start of next year.

Speaker 1: 38:51

Wishing you a wonderful week. Thanks so much for listening today Until next time. If you've enjoyed this episode, please send the link to a friend you know would appreciate it, subscribe and leave a review. I look forward to bringing you more organizing tips next time, but if you can't wait until then, you can go to my website or find me on Instagram, at carrowthor, or on Facebook at Caroline Organiser. Thanks for listening and I look forward to guiding you on your journey to find your clutter-free ever after.